Tuesday, February 4, 2014

'The Bachelor' Juan Pablo: Episode Five

In the episode five of "The Bachelor" the war world tour continues in Vietnam.


After weeks of handling breakdowns and reassuring people Renée finally gets a one-on-one date. Renée deserves a date more than anything and I bet she didn’t think she would have to referee more on the show than in her own house.

We learn very early on that it is extremely hot because the sweat doesn’t lie. What could make this hot date better? Juan Pablo tells Renée that she is going to get a custom made dress.

Next up is dinner and that dress isn’t what I was expecting as far as style but it did look really heavy. Juan Pablo and Renée talk about their children and still don’t kiss. To get along this well and not kiss is a little disappointing. Stay tuned though, the episode isn’t over yet.

Group Date

This is supposed to be a group date but it quickly turns into the Juan Pablo and Clare show. She doesn’t have a friend and needs a partner so she chooses Juan Pablo. Is it not required to have at least one friend on this show?

They all eat a Vietnamese dinner at some family’s house. Clare’s facial expressions were hilarious.

If Clare didn’t get enough attention that morning, he pulled her away first and left the date to go to his suite. This causes major side-eye among the girls. Then Juan Pablo takes the girls away one by one and makes out with them.

Sharleen gave us the wonderful comparison of “A panda in a room full of brown bears.”

Clare gets the rose but as we find out, later the night is very young.


Clare sneaks out and I keep wondering if they share rooms or not. She knocks on Juan Pablo’s door at 4 a.m. and wants to mark something off of her bucket list. Is it going to be skydiving, skinny-dipping or something even more dramatic? She quickly follows up saying “swimming in the warm water.” This may be the simplest thing I have ever heard on a bucket list ever.

They jump in the water and it gets weirder. Clare talks about opening up, but then “went for it” so interpret that as you wish.

As if I was not already ruined, Clare compares this to a baby giraffe being born. Now how am I supposed to go to the zoo again. 


Nikki finally gets a date and I am hoping that she is getting the Michelle Money edit. Of course, what is more fitting than a fear date? Juan Pablo wants her to rappel down the rock first, but changes his mind whenever she gets scared. In the process, he gets quite the view.

In typical Bachelor fashion, someone might appear cold or closed off at first and then become a favorite. Her talking about her job is refreshing but I am just not sure how she is a nurse and not a morning person.  They kiss and clearly have a solid connection. I am still thinking about Clare and her baby giraffe comment.

“Cocktail Party”

This wasn’t just the average cocktail party. It began very awkward and with Clare toasting to falling. She doesn’t stay there for long though, because Juan Pablo pulls her away and tells her what happened was a big mistake. What was this? Or her talking about how difficult it is for her to open up.

All of the other girls have no idea of what is going on beside Clare saying she has “bad allergies” which is slightly offensive to those of us that do.

Then Juan Pablo has to comfort Clare about her being upset over what happened in the first place. I can’t get over that they did this in a gross polluted ocean. That had to be uncomfortable.

Rose Ceremony

Danielle, Alli and Kelly went home. I am so bummed about Kelly and her one-liners.

Andi is my favorite and I really hope she ends up “The Bachelorette.” I will miss Kelly’s commentary and am glad to see Renee and Juan Pablo have a connection.
Who is your favorite?

All photo/visual rights belong to ABC/Disney. 


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